For this season & this time: something to uplift you and keep you grounded
No toxic positivity, just a truly tiny daily practice that cultivates well-being...even in challenging/difficult/f-ing awful times
I am writing this on November 4, on the eve of the US elections. It’s being posted on November 7, two days after the elections (by which time we may, or may not know the results) and exactly 21 days before US Thanksgiving.
This year, this season, this time...it has been, is, and I expect will continue to be, challenging on multiple fronts.
So as we come into the season of thanks and giving, I wanted to give you something easy and simple to support you.
Quite simply: the gift of gratitude. From me to you. And maybe from you to yourself.
21 Days of Gratitude
Coaching is based on positive psychology.
Where traditional (or clinical) psychology is primarily focused on diagnosing, treating, and understanding mental illnesses and psychological disorders (and is where most therapy starts); positive psychology is about answering the question: what makes people thrive? What makes life worth living? It is the psychology of well-being and flourishing, rather than the psychology of illness and distress.
We absolutely need both. But they are about two very different things: thriving vs recovery.
And one of the most robust positive psychology research findings is that gratitude is the foundation on which a flourishing, thriving life is built.
Not an attitude of gratitude. Bleh.
But a practice of gratitude.
Being encouraged to have an “attitude” of gratitude has always felt problematic to me. It feels like gaslighting. Like I’m supposed to count my blessings when I feel like doing anything but. It feels like “toxic positivity”: unhelpful at best, outright harmful at worst.
Fortunately, the research backs me up on this.
The research is that it is the practice, not an attitude, that fosters thriving and flourishing. A practice of gratitude is not about gaslighting ourselves or others, or not feeling hard or tough emotions, be they anger, fear, worry, doubt, panic, sadness or whatever. Rather, a practice of gratitude is simply a gentle invitation to just notice what else is true. It acknowledges the hard and shitty, and downright f-ing awful, and says yes, all of that is true.
But it’s not the only truth. What else is true?
Maybe what else is true is that it’s sunny day. Or your child gave you a hug this morning. Or you had a lovely cup of coffee this morning.
Of course this doesn’t negate “the bad.” It’s not supposed to. What it does do, is increase our capacity to deal productively with “the bad”.
So we don’t practice gratitude to feel better; rather we practice gratitude to grow our capacity to live life as we find it, as well as we can.
Given all of this how do we practice gratitude then.
That’s exactly what this 21-day gratitude program is all about.
Inspired by Laura Lavigne’s 21-Day Gratitude Reboot Program, I’ve created my own version.
For 21-days you’ll receive a simple prompt, asking you a question about one thing you can be grateful for that day. They will be random, silly, goofy, profound, surprising, and thoughtful. They’ll have you looking in unexpected places, seeing things that have always been there, but which have been flying “below the radar” so to speak.
What I invite you to do is: WRITE YOUR ANSWER DOWN.
Yes, with an actual pen (or pencil), on actual paper.
Don’t just think about it.
Actually write it out.
Why?
The physical act of writing reinforces the new neural pathways you are developing. It also makes the practice more tangible. And creative. You can shape your letters, draw, decorate or do anything else with writing on actual pen on actual paper.
In more technical terms: when you physically write something, you're combining kinesthetic movement with cognitive reflection, which helps to embed the experience more deeply into your nervous system.
Alright, enough said. Let’s get to it.
Simply click the link below and you'll get the first gratitude prompt. And then one every day thereafter, for 21 days.
No upsell. No tricks. No fee. No request to send me anything. This is simply between you and your journal/pieces of paper.
Want to do this with someone?
Wonderful. Just have them add their email here.
Why is this part of Building Compassionate Workplaces?
It nurtures a mindset that promotes empathy, resilience, and emotional awareness, all of which are essential to creating a work environment where people feel valued and understood. It enhances our capacity to handle challenges in the workplace. It helps us be more patient, considerate, and compassionate toward others.
This directly supports the ethos of building compassionate workplaces—where people can thrive and collaborate effectively. It’s not about creating a feel-good vibe; it’s about growing emotional intelligence and resilience, which ultimately drives better teamwork, higher engagement, and more sustainable success within the workplace.
Why 21-days?
This is not a quick fix or instant gratification practice. Gratitude’s benefits take time to accrue and emerge. Don’t expect to feel dramatically better immediately. Let this practice's subtle effect work in the background…and see where you are after a month, two months, or even three.
Some of the most meaningful changes we can make come through consistent, small actions over time.